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Well this little girl has no chance. She’s been locked up in the pretzel grip and this guy is stuffing her so full of sausage that her eyes will soon look like your local butchery’s windows.

She’s acting like she’s in total distress because of the manhandling but she’s actually enjoying that, it’s just that she has a bit of a fear of heights that’s getting to her at this point.

In the meantime her friend couldn’t be arsed about any of that for two reasons:

The first is that she knows her turn is next but the most important is that she’s about to break her highscore on Pokemon Trainer.

Well, I spoke a bucket-load of crap there which isn’t exactly unusual for me but let me pull out a line of seriousness:

Currently on offer is a Reality Kings discount for 74% off their entire network. Yup, that means all of their sites thrown into one bundle and it’s cheap as fuck. That’s about as serious as someone shouting “cunt!” on your back-swing.

Well, that was more than ‘a line’, so I lied. Who does just one line anyways?